I grew up in Germany and had a happy childhood where nothing was missing as far as I remember. I studied electrical engineering, because I thought you could make good money with that profession and lost complete interest in the subject during college. I lived in Indonesia where I developed a burning desire to travel the world. But again, I followed the path of money and started working for my family’s business, lived in Estonia for a while and finally moved to North Carolina. The pay was great, the job did not fulfill me, nor did I find any connection in the community.
After feeling depressed, anxious and empty inside, I picked up self destructive behaviors, and ended up severely abusing opiates for almost 8 years. I realized there was something missing in my life. Something that money couldn’t buy. Changing my surroundings, or my outer world, adding material things and traveling to 47 countries around the world did not result in any lasting change. There was inner emptiness and lack of purpose, a feeling of being disconnected and misaligned.
I was not living in the moment, lost complete interest in my work and for the most part possessions. I was working and saving money, only to fulfill my dreams once I had saved enough money. Boredom and depression would follow me wherever I went, and with the increased use of opiates, anxiety and panic was added to the mix.
I started reading books in search of knowledge, taught myself to meditate and explored other means of finding inner peace.
UNLEASHING MY POWER
My journey led me to Peru where an ayahuasca ceremony changed completely how I saw reality, made me curious, and sent me on a still ongoing spiritual journey of deep inner self exploration. That ceremony flooded me with a love, greater than anything I have ever experienced. The pure joy of being alive.
At that point, I did not know anything about plant medicines or healing power of entheogens. I simply wanted to trip. But that experience completely changed my relationship with these allies of mine, and instilled a first of knowledge that changed the literature I was reading.
With the help of plant medicine, I managed to drop my addictive behavior, and stopped taking any substances including alcohol. I regained my joy of life and a curiosity that ignited a new fire in me. The certainty that there is more to life than the eye can see, more than you can feel with your five senses kept me busier than I had ever been.
The psychedelic adventure and my hunger for books finally led me to Neurodynamic Breathwork (NDB). With a new self confidence and the conviction to never settle for anything less than what my heart desires, I knew that now was the time to make a change. In 2019 I quit my job as a manager in order to spend more time with my children, while they are still young. I decided to dedicate my life to the exploration of my own consciousness, and being of service to others. In 2021 I became a certified NDB facilitator and want to offer this gift of self transformation to everyone who is open, interested and curious.